Usually when MTV has an awards show coming up you can expect people (and by people I mean most of Young Hollywood as well as every irrelevant reality star they can conjure up in one night) to take fashion risks. You expect someone to show up wearing something disgustingly skimpy, and you expect excessive amounts of sequins and glitter and bright colors, but unfortunately this year was not about taking risks. It was about looking like utter disasters.
I will be the first person to admit that I may not be very fashion inclined – but I’m also not blind. You wouldn’t catch me dead in any of these outfits/dresses/whatever they can be labeled as. Remember that year Bjork wore a dress that looked like a swan? It’s like everyone decided to be Bjork this year.
Let me breakdown my personal opinions on the handful of pictures I’ve put up:
SNOOKI: I, personally, always expect that entire cast to wear something tragic and tacky and offensive to my eyeballs. But at least their usual fashion choices look like they found the most expensive albeit tacky dress store in Hollywood and went nuts. You can’t tell me that Snooki didn’t buy this dress at Forever 21, and while I may be an avid fan of Forever 21 even I know you can’t wear one of their dresses to the MTV Awards. Or any awards, for that matter.
DEENA: On the VMA pre-show Deena told whoever was interviewing her that she picked this dress to show her “personality.” She looks like one of those long lollipops on a stick if it were made shorter and chubbier and sold at the dollar store instead of Dylan’s.
KREAYSHAWN: I have no idea who this girl is or why she is at the VMA’s, but my first guess would be that Amy Winehouse and Kat Von D had a baby together and produced this monstrosity. Usually when I see someone I’ve never heard of looking ridiculous on a red carpet I assume they are doing it to get attention. Hasn’t anyone learned any better yet?
LMFAO: Not so much the dude on the left, but the dude on the right. He’s not the first person to wear a cheap replica of an original Elvis costume made to look brighter and more gawdy, but it’s the hole in the pants with the hand print over his crotch that really takes this to the next level. Why? Just why?
MILEY: When the show aired and I first saw Miley Cyrus on the red carpet I thought she was one of the real housewives of whatever city on Bravo and I wondered why she had been invited. One close up of her face and I realized who it really was, and then I was even more offended. I’ve seen Miley rock some really awesome outfits – she is very good at having fun with her choices and usually they are somewhat age appropriate. If this dress was cut a few inches above the knee, it would do just that. Unfortunately it’s like they lost the scissors and instead the final product was this horrible mismatch printed gown.
NICKI MINAJ: I love me some Nicki Minaj, but there is no explanation on my behalf necessary for this atrocity.